You won’t find this in the Public Employee Press:

More than 400 city employees have been arrested this year, including a cop charged with murder, a garbage man who allegedly hired a hit man, and two female teachers accused of seducing their underage students.

The roster of rogues also includes a Department of Transportation worker who allegedly ripped off $142,000 by claiming he and his family all underwent brain surgery and a cop charged with being part of an Albanian gang that dealt coke and burglarized Long Island homes.