Sciento(xico)logy

Perhaps even more depressing than the idea that those September 11 honor roll walls are quickly going to be out of date is the notion that 9/11 responders are desperately resorting to Scientology to rid their bodies of cancerous toxins:

Hubbard’s detoxification program, which Scientologists refer to as the “purification rundown,” requires an individual to ingest a vitamin cocktail and cooking oil, run on a treadmill and sweat heavily in a sauna with temperatures ranging from 140 to 180 degrees Fahrenheit for about a month. If Downtown Medical is to be believed, that combination is a miracle cure for many ailments. “Patients have had black paste coming out of their pores in the sauna,” states Woodworth on the site. “Their sweat has stained towels purple, blue, orange, yellow and black. They have reported bowel movements that are blue, or green, or that have smelled like smoke — despite the fact that they had not been at a fire scene for months.” A picture of a program participant holding a purple stained towel in his hands appears in a slideshow on their website, and program administrators say they have other similar photos available. Shards of glass have leaked from the pores of detox participants, according to the website. And accounts of the program’s benefits, written by rescue workers who served at Ground Zero, cover the site.