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Crotch Grabbing And Sexual Innuendo To Be Replaced By . . . Crotch Grabbing And Sexual Innuendo!

As Lady Macbeth might say, “Unsex me here”:

A production of Shakespeare’s “Macbeth” will replace a hip-hop festival next summer in a DUMBO venue controlled by the Brooklyn Bridge Park Conservancy — and organizers of the rap show believe that race played a role.

The Brooklyn Hip-Hop Festival — which brought thousands of people and big-name rappers to the park-and-condo waterfront development site in 2006 and 2007 — had already scheduled its 2008 production for the weekend of June 22.

But organizers were shocked last month to discover that the Brooklyn Bridge Park Conservancy had given those days to St. Ann’s Warehouse to stage a Polish rendition of that Scottish play.

Festival organizers believe the move was racially motivated.

“Hip hop brings a lot more brown people to this neighborhood, and people who live here are not comfortable with it,” said Wes Jackson, whose Room Service Production founded the festival in 2005.

“[People have told me that residents say], ‘The festival should be in Commodore Barry Park between the projects and the BQE, not next to my $2.5-million condo.'”

Whether racially motivated or not, the rejection of the hip-hop festival sounds very much like the scenario long imagined by critics of Brooklyn Bridge Park, where condo and commercial development will finance greenspace along a 1.3-mile stretch from DUMBO to the foot of Atlantic Avenue. Opponents believe that public events will not be public at all, but subject to the whims of the wealthy condo-dwellers whose maintenance fees will pay for the park’s upkeep.

Posted: September 30th, 2007 | Filed under: Brooklyn, Follow The Money, Sliding Into The Abyss Of Elitism & Pretentiousness, That's An Outrage!, There Goes The Neighborhood

The Next Twenty Minutes Of Your Park-Going Experience Is Sponsored By Alpo . . .

The recent formalization of the leash law has paved the way for further commercialization of the city’s parks:

If you visited Bryant Park on a recent Tuesday afternoon and muscled your way through the throng of suited spectators standing around the plaza, you could have watched a sleek black dog taking an acrobatic leap into a swimming pool.

The dog was participating in a water sport sponsored by DockDogs, a company that promotes the activity. But the dog’s antics appeared to hold little appeal for Karen Merz, a product development manager who was eating lunch in the plaza with a co-worker.

“If it was in the evening and it was like ‘Let’s watch a funny dog show,’ O.K.,” Ms. Merz said. “But I’m in the middle of work, and I’m all stressed out, and it’s, like, ridiculous.”

According to Maxine Teitler, the chairwoman of the Parks Committee for Community Board 5, such grumblings speak to a larger issue.

“There is a lot of concern about the commercialization of the parks,” said Ms. Teitler, whose board covers an area that includes Bryant Park and the two other parks that form Midtown’s green corridor: Madison Square Park and Union Square Park.

Posted: September 30th, 2007 | Filed under: Follow The Money, Project: Mersh

Where The Rubber Hits The Soul

If you’ve ever wondered what happens when someone gets “reassigned” during an investigation, now you know:

Just before 9 a.m., they file into large, sometimes windowless rooms.

In some cases, they punch time cards; in others, they scribble their names on a sign-in sheet.

They take their places in plastic chairs either grouped around tables or scattered haphazardly.

Some immediately pull out crossword puzzles or books. Some knit. Others hold golf-putting contests. One takes out his guitar and strums.

One day last week, another, wearing a leotard and tights, spread out on the floor and stretched before practicing ballet against a wall in a corner.

Nearby, gazing out a window, a man slowly fell asleep, his head in his hands.

It’s all in a day’s work on the city payroll.

For seven hours a day, five days a week, hundreds of Department of Education employees — who’ve been accused of wrongdoing ranging from buying a plant for a school against the principal’s wishes to inappropriately touching a student — do absolutely no work.

In an investigation inside the nine reassignment centers called “rubber rooms” where these employees are sent, The Post has learned that the number of salaried teachers sitting idly waiting for their cases to be heard has exploded to 757 this year — more than twice the number just two years ago — at a cost of about $40 million a year, based on the median teacher salary.

. . .

. . . [A]nother [rubber room attendant], an Army reservist who spent almost 3 1/2 years in a rubber room before he retired, begged to be able to go to Iraq instead of staying in DOE Siberia.

Posted: September 30th, 2007 | Filed under: That's An Outrage!

Things You Don’t Need A Psychic To Tell You Include . . .

Staten Island psychics conclude that the Mets are toast:

“It ain’t over till it’s over,” Yogi Berra famously quipped, but for one Staten Island psychic, it’s over even before it ain’t.

“They’re not going to come close to winning whatsoever,” seer Jim Weiss said yesterday. “I just don’t get a good feeling about this team.”

Zillions of pundits and fans have been getting bad vibes from this New York nine since they started tanking last month, and you don’t need a sixth sense to read the stats.

The Mets lost a comfortable seven-game lead over the Phillies and now stand a game behind after last night’s 7-4 loss.

Looking ahead to this tense weekend of baseball, which will likely decide whether the Mets will make the playoffs, the Advance consulted with Weiss in his Prince’s Bay office:

“I hope I’m wrong, but I wrote them off back in June,” he said. “It’s as if they’re out of step. They’re not coordinated as a team.”

. . .

Astrologer Tanya Milton of St. George said it would take several days’ work to run star charts for the bombing bullpen — five days for the whole team. But she did perform a tarot card reading for slumping shortstop Jose Reyes, using his date of birth to predict his fate:

“I’m sensing that he’s feeling very insecure about his fans, and that might put him in a tilt,” she said. “If he could block out negative energy and focus on the game, he will prove himself and it will be a good [series]. Geminis depend a lot on the approval of others. Their egos need to be stroked.”

Posted: September 29th, 2007 | Filed under: Insert Muted Trumpet's Sad Wah-Wah Here, Sports, Staten Island

It’s The “Ketchup, Mustard Or Relish” Race Of Architecture

Inferiority complex, anyone? The results are in on the race to number two:

The Bank of America Tower at One Bryant Park will reshape Manhattan’s skyline and force a revision of the record books that catalog the city’s giants.

The 54-story building stands 945 feet tall, but tops out at 1,200 feet with the addition of an ornamental spire, inheriting the title of New York’s second-tallest skyscraper. It was held by the Chrysler Building since Sept. 11, 2001, when the Twin Towers were destroyed and the Empire State Building returned to the top spot.

“The building is topped off already,” said Jordan Barowitz, director of external affairs of the Durst Organization, the real estate development firm that partnered with BofA to erect the building. “The last piece of steel went in a few weeks ago and the first tenants will arrive in May 2008.”

One Bryant Park doesn’t break any records without its decorative spire, but the use of such a device to raise a tower’s bragging rights isn’t out of the ordinary.

Posted: September 28th, 2007 | Filed under: Architecture & Infrastructure, The Geek Out
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