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Caveat Pleasure

Counterfeit Louis Vuitton handbags, sure. But counterfeit condoms, too? Not to sound harsh, but if you’re cheap enough to buy condoms at a 99-cent store, you probably deserve what you get:

Careful with those Trojan brand condoms from the discount store. They may not be the real thing.

Same with the Barbie doll and the Louis Vuitton handbag.

In raids in the metropolitan area yesterday, federal agents arrested at least eight people and charged them with heading a counterfeit products ring. Authorities say the ring has been smuggling into the country and then distributing massive quantities of fake brand-name goods manufactured in China, including Apple iPods, Major League Baseball and National Football League caps and Marvel comic books.

The counterfeits, which included millions of the phony Trojans, were sold for the past three years mainly in small discount stores in the area, as well as elsewhere in the country, including Texas and Virginia, according to court documents.

A spokeswoman for Church and Dwight, the company that manufactures the legitimate Trojan condoms in the United States, declined to comment on whether the counterfeit Chinese condoms could fail to prevent pregnancies or the spread of sexually transmitted diseases.

But a source familiar with the federal investigation said that while the counterfeit condoms were of inferior quality, samples had been tested and they were no riskier to use than legitimate ones.

The packaging of the Chinese condoms is almost identical to the legitimate ones, except that the counterfeit packaging is plastic, while the legitimate product is packaged in aluminum foil, said another source familiar with the investigation. “They [the counterfeiters] spent all their money on printing,” said the source.

Posted: May 30th, 2008 | Filed under: Consumer Issues, Just Horrible, Things That Make You Go "Oy", We're All Gonna Die!, What Will They Think Of Next?, You're Kidding, Right?

Ugh . . . Please Don’t Give Them Something Else To Be Snooty About

The city of hot air actually has a fairly small carbon footprint, making Christmas back home that much more unbearable for the families of smug, self-righteous transplants:

Despite New York’s reputation as a city of avid consumption, the carbon footprint of its residents is among the smallest in America, a new report shows.

In 2005, the average New Yorker emitted 0.67 tons of carbon from residential energy consumption, the 18th-lowest amount of 100 metro areas surveyed, according to yesterday’s Brookings Institution and Regional Plan Association report, which examined carbon emissions from transportation and residential sources. The average American emitted 1.16 tons.

The New York area also had the fourth-lowest carbon emissions per capita among the 100 other metropolitan areas.

Posted: May 30th, 2008 | Filed under: Blatant Localism, Grandstanding

Attorney General Cuomo Does The Heavy Lifting . . .

. . . and gets to the bottom of that gruesome Bodies exhibition, which, even though he liked and all, just felt funny in the end:

The company behind “Bodies . . . The Exhibition” has agreed to document the origin of the cadavers in its show at the South Street Seaport and give past patrons a full ticket refund, Attorney General Andrew Cuomo said yesterday.

“People have a right to know what they’re viewing,” Cuomo said at a news conference.

“The grim reality is that [show producer] Premier Exhibitions has profited from displaying the remains of individuals who may have been tortured and executed in China.”

There have long been rumors that the bodies are those of political prisoners.

Under the agreement, customers who can establish they would not have attended the exhibition had they known of the questions about the origins of the bodies are eligible for refunds.

Posted: May 30th, 2008 | Filed under: Grandstanding

Tell-Alls About Me, Should I Ever Be So Lucky, Will Be Pointlessly Perfect And Reflect Wonderfully On Any Administration I May Head

Perhaps when more than the ten people who read the Metro section start caring about him then he can feel smart about hiring loyal people, but until then, I don’t think there’s much of a market for a gripping tell-all about the Mayor of New York:

Mayor Bloomberg has no use for aides who write tell-alls like the one former White House press secretary Scott McClellan published.

“I just hopefully hire people who are a little more responsible, that’s the first thing I worry about,” Bloomberg said yesterday. “I’ve always thought that when you work for somebody, you have an obligation to not write a tell-all book afterwards.”

Posted: May 30th, 2008 | Filed under: Grandstanding

Life In The City . . .

. . . sometimes involves getting mugged at the movie theater:

A nanny and the 5-year-old son of an investment banker — enjoying an action flick at an Upper West Side multiplex — got a harrowing dose of real-life terror when a gunman robbed them in the darkened theater, the victim told The Post.

“It’s either your life or the little boy’s life,” the bandit told Marzena Drus, 27, as she clutched Nicholas Anzivino on her lap, she said.

The shocking incident happened during a showing of “Speed Racer” at Loews Lincoln Square on Broadway at West 68th Street Tuesday afternoon, the nanny said.

“It was an action part and [Nicholas] was into the movie,” she said.

“Someone comes behind me and points a gun at me and says, ‘Hand me the purse!’ I said, ‘No!’ ”

The feisty Drus said the thief just reached over her and Nicholas and grabbed her purse.

“I had the gun pointed at my head,” she said. “Then he grabbed my purse and left.”

A theater manager recovered Drus’ empty purse nearby and offered her two free tickets.

Nicholas’ mom, Stephanie Anzivino, an investment banker at Merrill Lynch, was incensed.

“It seems highly irresponsible, to put it mildly, to have someone running around in a theater with a gun and not to try to do something,” she said.

Posted: May 29th, 2008 | Filed under: Jerk Move, Manhattan
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