“Friend Comes Over To Pregame With My Bottles From Trader Joe’s, And We Thank God For Unemployment Insurance Because It Pays Us To Live In Our Expensive Luxury Apartments With No Income”

Usually New York Magazine’s Daily Intel “Sex Diaries” feature just makes you feel icky. This entry, however, about a laid-off banker who has no sex, may be the first one to evoke schadenfreude:

I used to be such a romantic, but NYC has left me bitter and jaded at the age of 24.

Hahahahahahahaha!