As Far As We Can Tell, David Lee Roth Is Not To Blame*

And when everything calms down, I’m pretty convinced this could become the basis for the next great Barney Miller-type show:

Two medics made an outrageous 50-minute tape on the job that shows their crude interactions with hookers and bums — and a nasty running commentary making fun of patients, neighborhoods and the FDNY, The Post has learned.

The pair was forced to resign last week, but the public had no idea just how badly they betrayed their badges.

The footage included:

* A shocking sequence in which a prostitute bares her breasts.

* A nasty prank in which a medic taps a drunk on the shoulder before he tips over.

* A mean-spirited verbal poke at a homeless woman frequently picked up for public drunkenness.

* A medic — one of the amateur filmmakers — asleep in the cab of the ambulance in broad daylight. He’s then shaken awake by the other medic as a supervisor approaches.

* An intoxicated couple in their home filmed during an emergency call.

The X-rated tape, spliced together and depicting patients and street people, some of whom were apparently unaware they were being filmed, is described as a crude mix of “Girls Gone Wild” — the risqué Joe Francis films of co-eds flashing their breasts — and Don Imus-style ridicule.

“EMTs Gone Wild,” one insider dubbed the disgusting display.

*Remember?

Harassing Third Graders (Charming!)

City females continue to endure persistent street harassment regardless of looks and irrespective of whether they have even hit puberty:

Virtually every female in the city has experienced street harassment, no matter her age, ethnicity, size or the way she’s dressed.

Often it’s just annoying, when it’s a comment in passing or the stereotypical catcalls from construction sites. But there are also times when it becomes offensive, threatening and a form of sexual assault.

“We have girls as young as 8 or 9 years old who say they are afraid to walk by this corner or down that street because they’ve had inappropriate things said to them and they’ve been followed or even touched by these men,” said Mandy Van Deven, director of community organizing for Girls for Gender Equity, a Brooklyn-based education and mentoring program. “This issue consistently comes up every time we ask girls about things they are struggling with.”

Fuckin’ Tourists

What he should have done was sold them low-quality schwag and then had them arrested:

Two thugs from North Carolina were arrested for viciously beating and slashing an elderly homeless man while trying to score pot in Washington Square Park, authorities said yesterday.

Scott Berry, 24, and Adam Mashburn, 22, both of Charlotte, asked Al Latimer, 71, for marijuana at about 5 p.m. on April 4, sources said. When Latimer said he had none, they beat him and cut his scalp with a razor blade, the Manhattan District Attorney’s Office said.

Jesus, What A Jerk

I swear Friday night I heard the newscaster mumble “God, what a douchebag” under his breath:

A 101-year-old walker-wielding Queens woman bravely stood up to a 30-something mugger — but youth ultimately won out and the ghoul made off with a measly $33 after clocking her with a massive roundhouse punch.

The heinous attack occurred in the vestibule of her building at 172-90 Highland Ave. in Jamaica Estates last Sunday at 12:30 p.m.

It was captured on a building surveillance video. The man later robbed and beat an 85-year-old woman in a nearby building.

“There has to be a special rung of hell for him,” a police official said of the man, who remains at large.

Rose Morat, who was born during the Roosevelt administration — Theodore, that is — said that in her younger days the granny-beating goon might not have been so lucky.

“Fifteen years ago we would have had a tussle,” she told The Post last night, with a bravado that would have made the Rough Rider president proud.

Morat said she was heading out to Sunday Mass at Immaculate Conception when she encountered the fiend near the building’s front door.

“He looked pleasant and he had a beautiful smile,” she said.

He even seemed chivalrous at first, she said, offering to help her to the street.

“I saw the man sitting there,” she said. “He got up and said, ‘I’ll help you with your walker.'”

“No, thank you, I know how to handle myself,” she said.

The mugger then helped her with the door, but as she tried to pass through, he pounced on her.

“All of a sudden I got the bang, and then I saw stars,” said Morat, who suffered a fractured cheekbone.

I Am Sanman, Hear Me Roar

I believe the correct epithet is “towelheads,” not “diaperheads,” although I’m sure after seeing and smelling so many diapers during a workday it’s easy to make that mistake:

A city sanitation worker who told of hating “diaperheads” was arrested for allegedly attacking a Muslim woman in Queens.

Victor Lambot, 53, allegedly went berserk when he saw the 34-year-old victim wearing an Islamic head covering on Colden Street in Flushing Tuesday, police sources said.

The woman told investigators that she had stopped her car to give Lambot room to get off a sanitation truck when the 6-feet-10, 265-pound trash hauler punched her driver’s side mirror and screamed, “That’s what you get!”

The woman immediately called 911 and officers took an accident report. Later, the NYPD’s Hate Crime Task Force went to her home.

And lest you think this is some sort of he says/she says:

Detectives went to the Lambot’s home and he told them, “I am prejudiced against those motherf- – -ing diaperheads.”