Dick Wolf Figures Out One More Episode For Next Season

Time was, a murder in East Harlem was just that. No longer:

Manhattan prosecutors are giving credence to the bizarre-sounding “assisted suicide” defense of an ex-con charged with brutally stabbing Long Island motivational speaker Jeffrey Locker — found dead and robbed in his car in East Harlem last summer.

. . .

“This is like a TV movie. You just don’t see this kind of thing happen. The sad thing is, he can’t do it himself. He goes to Harlem and he hires some beleaguered guy from the street, a down and out guy who’s a total stranger.”

In The End, All Anyone Really Wants Or Needs Is A Paycheck

It’s like old-timey-time patronage, just that fewer people get to benefit (“more for fewer” has been kind of a theme in America in recent years):

Even as he warns that the city may have to lay off thousands of workers, Mayor Michael R. Bloomberg has found city jobs for 15 members of his re-election campaign, many of whom are earning six-figure salaries, records and interviews show.

The hirings suggest that while Mr. Bloomberg is calling for a leaner government that reflects the economic downturn, he is finding money in the budget for those who engineered his unexpectedly close re-election.

In addition, seven city employees who left their jobs to work on the campaign have returned, in many cases at higher salaries. Together, the appointments cost taxpayers more than $2 million in government wages.

Then there’s this:

A person close to the mayor said Mr. Wolfson would play “a key role in developing policies and lead in selling them.” He is likely to focus on promoting national issues like gun control and immigration reform, a priority for Mr. Bloomberg.

Mr. Bloomberg has talked to aides about hiring Mr. Wolfson since shortly after the election. He formally offered him the job in the last few weeks, aides said.

“It’s one of the biggest stages in the world,” said a strategist close to the mayor. “He can shape the agenda and get the message across in a way that possibly nobody else in the country can.”

There’s still a big nasty pothole on my street you know . . . will Wolfson advocate for that?

People, If You’re Going To Trip Up And Destroy Art, Please Try To Do It In The Ancient Near Eastern Art Galleries Or Something; That Stuff Is Boring

Oy:

A clutzy art lover tripped onto a rare Picasso painting at the Metropolitan Museum of Art, tearing a hole in the century-old masterpiece, the museum said Sunday.

Location Scout: Metropolitan Museum of Art.

For A While There People Did All Sorts Of Crazy Shit With Their Money

Wow, you can climb into a cool pimped out limo and smoke pot with the driver:

The owners of Stuyvesant Town and Peter Cooper Village, the iconic middle-class housing complexes overlooking the East River in Manhattan, have decided to turn over the properties to creditors, officials said Monday morning.

. . .

For tenant advocates and urban planners, the sale underscored the loss of affordable housing in the city and the highly speculative financial structures that, they warned, would only end in disaster.

Sorry, wrong link there . . . turns out you can actually pay $100 an hour to rent a pimped out limo and smoke pot with the driver:

For $100 an hour, late-night club crawlers can spread across its red leather seats, roll up its tinted windows and share a fat joint with the driver – Al, the affable cannabis chauffeur.

This Trashcan Sponsored By Former Council Member Michael E. McMahon Using A Strange System Of Discretionary Spending That For All Intents And Purposes Looks Like A Huge Slush Fund

In case you were somehow unclear about why these guys put their names on garbage cans:

Former Councilman Michael McMahon (D-SI) spent $24,000 in city funds on 46 bright green bins bearing his name in July 2008, while he was a member of the council and a front-runner to fill an open seat in Congress.

But after he won the congressional election that November, the then-outgoing city lawmaker had the Sanitation Department revise labels on the baskets to read, “Sponsored By Former Council Member Michael E. McMahon.”

See also: Unanswered Questions: City Council’s Phantom Funds (Gotham Gazette, April 14, 2008).