{"id":809,"date":"2014-10-15T01:54:27","date_gmt":"2014-10-15T05:54:27","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.bridgeandtunnelclub.com\/slightest\/?p=809"},"modified":"2014-10-15T01:54:27","modified_gmt":"2014-10-15T05:54:27","slug":"seo-was-a-hero-to-most-but-it-never-meant-shit-to-me","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.bridgeandtunnelclub.com\/slightest\/2014\/10\/15\/seo-was-a-hero-to-most-but-it-never-meant-shit-to-me\/","title":{"rendered":"SEO Was A Hero To Most But It Never Meant Shit To Me"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><strong>October 7, 2014<\/strong><\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" lang=\"en\">\n<p>Quite pleased that all three of Percy Harvin&#39;s touchdowns were called back.<\/p>\n<p>&mdash; Bridge + Tunnel Club (@batclub) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/batclub\/status\/519580632007966721\">October 7, 2014<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><br \/>\nIt was really amazing &#8212; three penalties called back three Percy Harvin touchdowns . . . THUS PRESERVING WEEK 5 FANTASY DOMINATION!!!<\/p>\n<p><strong>October 8, 2014<\/strong><\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" lang=\"en\">\n<p>Please, God &#8212; allow the Royals to beat either of these fucking teams.<\/p>\n<p>&mdash; Bridge + Tunnel Club (@batclub) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/batclub\/status\/519718960489451520\">October 8, 2014<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" lang=\"en\">\n<p>Please, God &#8212; allow the Orioles to beat either of these fucking teams.<\/p>\n<p>&mdash; Bridge + Tunnel Club (@batclub) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/batclub\/status\/519719010686873603\">October 8, 2014<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><br \/>\nHedging Tweets; isn&#039;t everyone as sick of the Giants and Cardinals as I am?<\/p>\n<p><strong>October 9, 2014<\/strong><\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" lang=\"en\">\n<p>No, go ahead, I have time &#8212; please feel free to load up all the extraneous ads and social media widgets before you get to the content.<\/p>\n<p>&mdash; Bridge + Tunnel Club (@batclub) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/batclub\/status\/520199649576370176\">October 9, 2014<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><br \/>\nI have a feeling that the culprit was an out-of-date link that Google pooped out, but it&#039;s a feeling I have often enough to seem common. Do you understand how fucking annoying it is to run over to the laptop to check something while the kids are up and about, only to have some page like Google Fucking Maps load up a bunch of extraneous bullshit and then hang and\/or crash? It&#039;s a slap in your fucking face, that&#039;s what it is. People, be basic, jam econo. In time we can make it a movement. And no, I don&#039;t care that it&#039;s free fucking content.<\/p>\n<hr>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" lang=\"en\">\n<p>Just heard a metallified version of The Clash&#39;s &quot;Brand New Cadillac&quot; for a, uh, Cadillac commercial. Hrm. Need a minute to process this.<\/p>\n<p>&mdash; Bridge + Tunnel Club (@batclub) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/batclub\/status\/520356558031826944\">October 9, 2014<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><br \/>\nThe Clash, being basically unassailable, could sell their firstborn to the United Arab Emirates for all I care. Still, this made me do a double take. I was wondering if it was actually Metallica doing the version [checking . . .] it&#039;s not. And . . . JFC! . . . I&#039;m learning for the first time that The Clash actually covered <a href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Brand_New_Cadillac\">it<\/a>. Honestly, I bet the ad people didn&#039;t even realize that until they figured out who to contact for the rights; it&#039;s such a sweet spot for the 40-60 set. And, ultimately, it&#039;s still not as jarring as the <a href=\"http:\/\/youtu.be\/2jUOvxG7440\">Buzzcocks-AARP ad<\/a> from a few years back.<\/p>\n<p><strong>October 10, 2014<\/strong><\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" lang=\"en\">\n<p>So this is the point in the evening where I get so tired that I can&#39;t focus, and my sleepy self resembles some sort of  bobblehead.<\/p>\n<p>&mdash; Bridge + Tunnel Club (@batclub) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/batclub\/status\/520457318153322497\">October 10, 2014<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><br \/>\nSelf-explanatory; also, the exhaustion is so palpable that the notion that this seems &#034;wise&#034; or &#034;important enough to mention&#034; is totally absurd. Also, that&#039;s like every night. But point taken.<\/p>\n<hr>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" lang=\"en\">\n<p>JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, DON&#39;T PEOPLE UNDERSTAND THAT IN ADDITION TO LOOKING INSANE, ALL CAPS IS ALSO REALLY HARD TO READ?<\/p>\n<p>&mdash; Bridge + Tunnel Club (@batclub) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/batclub\/status\/520459996388405248\">October 10, 2014<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><br \/>\nHAHA! GET IT? Actually, a project that&#039;s being worked upon made me remember something I learned in teacher school about how our brains do better with lower-case, in terms of using the spatial differences to speed reading. It&#039;s why SPEECHES WRITTEN IN ALL CAPS ARE SO FUCKING DUMB; your brain is being overextended at a moment when you need to make it look effortless. <a href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/All_caps#Readability\">THIS SUMMARIZES IT!!!!!<\/a><\/p>\n<hr>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" lang=\"en\">\n<p>Also, I just really love the name &quot;Bishop Sankey.&quot;<\/p>\n<p>&mdash; Bridge + Tunnel Club (@batclub) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/batclub\/status\/520548343089750016\">October 10, 2014<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><br \/>\nIt&#039;s still a good name, lo these five days later.<\/p>\n<p><strong>October 11, 2014<\/strong><\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" lang=\"en\">\n<p>Hell is . . . mismatched Gladware lids-containers.<\/p>\n<p>&mdash; Bridge + Tunnel Club (@batclub) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/batclub\/status\/520791333456609281\">October 11, 2014<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><br \/>\nSometimes everyday life is completely, utterly, irredeemably unbearable.<\/p>\n<hr>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" lang=\"en\">\n<p>Do you want to know the 18 best brunch spots in Chicago? Me, neither.<\/p>\n<p>&mdash; Bridge + Tunnel Club (@batclub) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/batclub\/status\/521127373606248448\">October 12, 2014<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><br \/>\nSEO was a hero to most but it never meant shit to me. Sorry about that comma there. I guess.<\/p>\n<p><strong>October 12, 2014<\/strong><\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twiiter-tweet\" lang=\"en\">\n<p>Two families on our street motivating early to get somewhere. Please let it be the really crowded pumpkin farm down by Princeton.<\/p>\n<p>&mdash; Bridge + Tunnel Club (@batclub) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/batclub\/status\/521284806274199552\">October 12, 2014<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><br \/>\nAs the FarmersOnly.com people can&#039;t stop getting across to late-night ESPN viewers, City Folks Just Don&#039;t Get It. It was still bonkers at the pumpkin-apple-palooza we visited up in Dutchess County.<\/p>\n<hr>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" lang=\"en\">\n<p>As usual, the goal in cleaning the kitchen is simply to make it look slightly less like the facilities at a frat house.<\/p>\n<p>&mdash; Bridge + Tunnel Club (@batclub) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/batclub\/status\/521481848631746562\">October 13, 2014<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><br \/>\nMostly the beer cans. Somewhat the inexplicable and gross hair all over the floor.<\/p>\n<hr>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" lang=\"en\">\n<p>It&#39;s Sunday night; time for FirstCom Music&#39;s &quot;Powersurge&quot; <a href=\"http:\/\/t.co\/OXQ0IsQO94\">http:\/\/t.co\/OXQ0IsQO94<\/a><\/p>\n<p>&mdash; Bridge + Tunnel Club (@batclub) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/batclub\/status\/521508173187125248\">October 13, 2014<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><br \/>\nSO EXCITED I finally figured out the title\/provenance of this piece of music. It&#039;s so iconic. If a band covered it I think I&#039;d throw my underwear on stage. There&#039;s a similar earworm they use for basketball highlights that I can&#039;t Google my way out of.<\/p>\n<p><strong>October 13, 2014<\/strong><\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" lang=\"en\">\n<p>Flo is in Mike Rowe territory in terms of ad overexposure. Just learned that she was the one talking to Peggy here: <a href=\"http:\/\/t.co\/yjOB9e6KRY\">http:\/\/t.co\/yjOB9e6KRY<\/a><\/p>\n<p>&mdash; Bridge + Tunnel Club (@batclub) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/batclub\/status\/521520418919055360\">October 13, 2014<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><br \/>\nI remember reading <a href=\"http:\/\/www.wsbtv.com\/news\/news\/progressive-girl-has-strange-pull-on-wsb-tv-channe\/nFDMR\/\">this article<\/a> a long, long time ago and thinking something along the lines of, &#034;Oh, she&#039;s only going to be on 12 more Progressive ads then.&#034; That must have been 150 ads ago. You&#039;d think that character would be lodged so deeply in your mental space that nothing else would penetrate it, but it&#039;s actually such a pervasive ad that she becomes invisible, sort of like the president, or Peyton Manning, or <a href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Richard_Lewis_%28comedian%29\">Richard Lewis<\/a>. The YouTube clip was new to me.<\/p>\n<p><strong>October 14, 2014<\/strong><\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" lang=\"en\">\n<p>Could I get a sticker for peeing on the floor?<\/p>\n<p>&mdash; Bridge + Tunnel Club (@batclub) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/batclub\/status\/522028168837074945\">October 14, 2014<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><br \/>\nSaying the kids say the &#034;darnedest things&#034; belittles their superior sense of timing and insight.<\/p>\n<hr>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" lang=\"en\">\n<p>Honestly, I feel like I need to see Jay-Z shill for Viagra. And I won&#39;t take &quot;no&quot; for an answer.<\/p>\n<p>&mdash; Bridge + Tunnel Club (@batclub) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/batclub\/status\/522201877141024768\">October 15, 2014<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><br \/>\nRight? You want to see this, don&#039;t you? He is <em>forty-four years old<\/em>, for Pete&#039;s sake.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>October 7, 2014 Quite pleased that all three of Percy Harvin&#39;s touchdowns were called back. &mdash; Bridge + Tunnel Club (@batclub) October 7, 2014 It was really amazing &#8212; three penalties called back three Percy Harvin touchdowns . . . THUS PRESERVING WEEK 5 FANTASY DOMINATION!!! October 8, 2014 Please, God &#8212; allow the Royals [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[944],"tags":[971,953,952,975,974,972,973,976],"class_list":["post-809","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-too-much-information","tag-all-caps","tag-annotated-twitter","tag-fantasy-island","tag-firstcoms-powersurge","tag-hell-is","tag-middle-age","tag-on-comedy","tag-rejected"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bridgeandtunnelclub.com\/slightest\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/809","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bridgeandtunnelclub.com\/slightest\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bridgeandtunnelclub.com\/slightest\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bridgeandtunnelclub.com\/slightest\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bridgeandtunnelclub.com\/slightest\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=809"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.bridgeandtunnelclub.com\/slightest\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/809\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":810,"href":"https:\/\/www.bridgeandtunnelclub.com\/slightest\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/809\/revisions\/810"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bridgeandtunnelclub.com\/slightest\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=809"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bridgeandtunnelclub.com\/slightest\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=809"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bridgeandtunnelclub.com\/slightest\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=809"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}