When Foie Gras Is Outlawed Only Outlaws Will Enjoy The Rarified Pleasure Of Gorging Themselves On Unnaturally Large Goose Liver

It’s not so much a slippery slope as it is a mile-long water slide into a giant vat of mayonnaise:

Restaurants reeling from the Board of Health’s recent trans fat ban may have to gear up for another fight. Animal rights advocates are pushing for legislation to ban foie gras — which is French for “fatty liver” — claiming the duck or goose appetizer is produced by inhumane farming practices.

Gene Baur, president and co-founder of the Farm Sanctuary — an animal advocacy group with farms upstate and in California — is trying to drum up support among restaurants and diners through his “No foie gras” campaign launched last month.

Foie gras is produced by force feeding animals through a pipe, and Baur explained this can severely hurt the birds.

“Their internal organs get pushed against their lungs and they can’t breathe,” Baur said on a trip to the city last week.

“When people see these farm animals being force fed and their livers expand 10 times their normal size, they’re horrified. These animals are being pushed to their biological limits and put through such misery for a high-end appetizer. It’s the height of gastronomic narcissism.”

City Councilman Alan Gerson, who represents restaurant-rich neighborhoods such as TriBeCa and SoHo, planned to introduce such legislation around Thanksgiving, but tabled it. He is “still pursuing it and doing outreach at this very moment,” his spokesman Paul Nagel said yesterday.

The animal rights groups involved have “legitimate concerns,” Nagel said. “But there are economic issues and issues of choice, so he’s giving it serious consideration.”

You know what? Fuck you.