OK, Well Whatever Chancellor Helmut Un-Kohl . . .

The bicycle helmet industry wins by making fashion victims out of hyper-manly bicycle messengers:

A new bike safety law takes effect today requiring delivery workers to wear helmets on the job, and members of the city’s bike messenger community are in a spin.

“[Wearing a helmet is] something that’s not cool. You look kind of dumb,” said Carlos Ramirez, 32, a 12-year messenger veteran and a Team Puma racer. “I really don’t want to wear a helmet, but I will.”

Ramirez began wearing a helmet last month, motivated by the law and a friend who hit his head in a bike accident. The new law mandates employers provide head gear, but Ramirez didn’t want just any helmet.

“I got a really beautiful $200 helmet worn by [cyclists] in the Tour de France,” he said. “It’s really light, so you don’t really feel it.”

Some messengers don’t care about the $25 to $50 fines. Employers failing to provide helmets could pay up to $250.

“It should be your choice,” said messenger Scott “Ham” Hamilton, 36. “It’s not like you’re on a motorcycle. You’re not going that fast.”

He’s no stranger to accidents in his 13 years on the job. He estimates having hit more than 100 jaywalkers.

“I’ve never seen a jaywalker get a ticket, but when they cross, they don’t look,” he said. “But I’ve got to wear a helmet?”

He wore a helmet once “to make my grandmother happy.” He doesn’t plan to start wearing one now.

Then again, shouldn’t they be a little more worried about the fact that these guys ride around without brakes?