Actor Stephen Baldwin Is My Shepherd, Or What Would McManus Do?

Stephen Baldwin responds to the question What Would Jesus Do? with the obvious answer — photograph sodomites’ license plates and run the pictures in the local newspaper:

Actor Stephen Baldwin has his shorts in a bunch over a sex shop opening near his estate in Rockland County — so much so, he plans to destroy the lives of its patrons.

The least-known of the Baldwins, Stephen, a born-again Christian, parked himself outside the store’s Route 59 location in Nyack on Friday and took snapshots of construction workers walking in and out of the building.

Once the smut shop opens in a few months, the 39-year-old star of “The Usual Suspects” plans to photograph patrons’ license plates and run their names in the local newspaper to shame them from ever returning.

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In addition to selling sex toys and porn, the shop will also feature video booths where patrons can watch hardcore flicks in total privacy.

“These guys want to do this business, God bless ’em. That’s between them and God. They’ll have to deal with that for eternity. But the people of Nyack do not want this location where it is,” Baldwin said.

Thank goodness — sorry, thank God — Stephen Baldwin is there to right Nyack’s moral compass, protecting them like a shepherd guarding his flock:

At the Jiffy Lube across the street, workers weren’t impressed by the anti-porn campaign.

“Honestly, they should put a strip club there. We wouldn’t mind,” oil-changer Kevin Lair, 28, told The Post.

“I don’t even know why they want to put an adult book store here. There’s already a good one up the road.”