That’s America!

Meanwhile, back in the real world of hard-to-get tables at actual restaurants, entrepreneurs sold Valentine’s Day reservations on eBay:

A few entrepreneurs grabbed up impossible-to-get seatings at some of the nation’s top restaurants for Feb. 14, then sat back and watched the bids trickle in.

“I figured lazy guys willing to spend money on their girlfriends were a perfect target group,” said Jonathan Heines, 26, of Manhattan. “If a guy is going to spend over $200 on dinner and gifts, what’s an extra $10 to $30 to get the reservation you really want?”

Heines said he set up a spreadsheet the week of Jan. 14 and snagged about 20 Valentine’s Day reservations across New York, Los Angeles and Las Vegas.

He then listed the rare commodities on craigslist.org with a link to his eBay account.

His reservation for Spice Market, which cost him zilch to make and 80 cents to list, garnered the highest price: $18.50.

“It was great,” said the buyer of the 10 p.m. Spice Market table. “I’ve greased concierges for more than that on less competitive nights.”

Heines made about $120 selling eight of his 20 reservations.