Thanks A Lot, Mom. Jerk.

One of the quirky benefits of growing up in New York City is that parents are forced to accept that their grown children will move back home after college. Until now:

My daughter recently graduated from college and got her first real job. I thought I’d be one of those parents who worried about adjusting to an empty nest.

I wish. My daughter is still living at home.

. . .

Not only is my daughter living with me, so is her dog — an 80-pound Shepherd Akita rescue. She has a boyfriend too, and he’s hanging out here most of the time. Running into the realities of New York real estate, she couldn’t find an affordable apartment to rent in a neighborhood where it was safe for her to go outside, even with her dog.

. . .

I have a great two-bedroom, two-bathroom apartment with a very large terrace, an apartment I was lucky enough to have bought 26 years ago. But these days my two cats, their litter box and I are largely confined to my bedroom. That’s because my daughter’s dog thinks it’s great fun to chase my cats and bark at them.

. . .

It could be worse. My friend Leslie lives in a studio apartment with her son who graduated from college five years ago.

Her devastating conclusion:

To all my pals who decided not to have children and who may be questioning that decision, there’s a lot to be said for a nice cat or a dog. They’re never grumpy and they don’t borrow your clothes.