Dammit HBO, You Got My Hopes Up!

The good news, if you’re into the idea of open relationships and communal living, is that there’s still an option available to you. The bad news is that you’re relegated to aging hippies on Staten Island:

When an athletic 60-year-old named Jessica arrived at Ganas four years ago, Mildred promptly invited her to a meeting with five men in the community. “All of these men are available for you — although most of them are already in primary relationships,” she remembers Mildred telling her. “Why don’t you date them all?” Jessica went through them one by one, eventually settling on the two she liked.