What’s Not To Worry About?

Is it that the MTA is using capital funds and going into debt to accomplish routine maintenance? Is it that its supposed budget surpluses are total book cooking*? Is it the fact that they won’t finish fixing subway stations until 2026? Take your pick:

The Metropolitan Transportation Authority has fallen so deeply into debt that it relies on borrowed money to repair its buses, subways and commuter rail systems but still cannot keep them adequately maintained, a report released yesterday revealed.

The report, issued by the non-profit Citizens Budget Commission, said the MTA has operated at a deficit 13 of the past 14 years and would likely have to raise fares 30 percent or more to balance its budget. The deficit currently stands at $2 billion, according to the commission.

“It’s not trivial; these are big deficits each year,” said commission executive vice president Charles Brecher at a conference in Manhattan to announce the report.

While MTA executive director Katherine Lapp, who also attended the conference, did not dispute any of the commission’s figures, she said the agency has made great strides financially in recent years. The existing debt, Lapp said, results largely from past deficits and current rising pension and health costs.

To create the appearance of yearly surpluses, Brecher said the MTA removes routine maintenance costs from its operating budget and places the cost into its capital budget, a separate pool for funding new transit projects.

As a result, two-thirds of the capital funding borrowed from state and federal governments goes to regular upkeep — not capital projects, the report said.

Fully restoring the MTA’s transit systems, or bringing them to a “state of good repair,” will take years, Brecher said. The Long Island Rail Road, for instance, will not complete repair on its infrastructure until 2014. Metro-North stations won’t be brought to full repair until 2020. And city subway stations will not be restored until 2026, according to the report.

*And thanks, by the way, for reminding us about the total unmitigated idiocy of that holiday fare special.

What Would George Plimpton Do?

Since Sept. 11, residents in fireworks-rich areas cower every time an unexpected pyrotechnic display takes place:

While pyrotechnics are often associated with Independence Day, the city, following the 2003 death of the unofficial fireworks commissioner, George Plimpton, has been approving dozens of requests for fireworks displays throughout the year. Sponsors range from the retailer Target to Princess Cruises to the president of the Bronx.

The displays — each approved by the New York Fire Department’s Explosive Unit — often cause nighttime noise that has set some residents to complaining.

Detective Frank Bogucki, community affairs officer for the 17th precinct, which serves Manhattan’s Turtle Bay and Sutton Place among other communities, said that he gets a handful of complaints from residents who get startled after each fireworks show that “comes over our heads” from the East River. He added that the residents don’t like it because they think it’s something more serious.

“In these days, what we’re dealing with every day,” said Detective Bogucki, referring to the heightened worries of New Yorkers post-September 11, 2001, “it’s kind of concerning.”

A volunteer at the Turtle Bay Association, Olga Hoffman, said that the terrorist attacks of September 11 changed her attitude toward surprise fireworks displays. “Before it didn’t bother me,” she said. “After 9/11, it did.”

. . .

A producer for Fireworks for Grucci, which does about 20 shows in New York City each year, M. Philip Butler, said that there has not been much of a slowdown of business since September 11, 2001. He said that even though there was a decline in shows in 2003 (although not in 2002 because corporate sponsors had already included those shows in their budget from the year before), they’ve since experienced a “great comeback.” “We have fireworks shows now in New York Harbor without any hesitation,” he said.

Mr. Butler classified his company as “neighborhood friendly,” and said they don’t use noise-making salutes — “the workhorse of the grand finale” of any fireworks show — except on the Fourth of July and New Year’s Eve.

But what does any of this have to do with George Plimpton? It’s still unclear:

Plimpton was appointed fireworks commissioner by Mayor Lindsey. “I am supposed to resign each time there is a change of administration, but I don’t,” Plimpton said in an interview in the defunct Canadian literary journal Pagitica. The fireworks commissioner post has been vacant since Plimpton’s death in 2003.

Plimpton’s successor as editor of the Paris Review, Philip Gourevitch, said that for all he knows the title of fireworks commissioner belongs to Plimpton “for all eternity.” Last year, a New York Sun editorial recommended Mr. Gourevitch for the position. “I’m not sure that I’m qualified,” Mr. Gourevitch said recently. ‘I like explosions plenty. But I’ve never been involved in shaping, forming, or making them.”

Real Time Shack Cam Shows That What’s Good For Us Is Not Always The Best For Business

Technology is cool:

Forward reeled the mind in jerky, five-second stop-time intervals, when it was learned that Danny Meyer had installed a Web cam on top of Shake Shack, his Madison Square Park dog-and-burger stand, so that customers, who often stand in line for an hour and a half for a Chicago dog and cheese fries, might, as the Web site notes, “plan your time, check out the line.”

. . .

The line could be short when you checked on your computer, but what would it be like by the time you got there? Also, even if you see the line, how do you know how quickly it will move?

“Yeah, it’s tough,” Mr. Meyer said. “You can’t look at a camera and have an idea of what any human being is going to order. He could put in an order for one hamburger, he could order 20 more for his friends. We’re perhaps not as sophisticated as we would like. I do think it will be useful.”

When the cam idea first came up, “there were people on our team who said this is the dumbest thing we could do,” Mr. Meyer said. “If they see a line, they won’t go there. I said if that’s the case we will have found our Yogi Berra moment, wherein Yogi Berra says the place is so crowded nobody goes there anymore.”

See also: Shack Cam.

While It May Appear Unprofessional, It Was Hardly The Worst Thing In The World, Or, “Protect & Lob”

Apparently citizens don’t find on-duty egg fights very funny:

Sgt. Salvatore R. Carola, 38, was punished after the Internal Affairs Bureau got a videotape from an East Flatbush resident who witnessed the Father’s Day shenanigans.

Sources said Carola, an 11-year veteran, was in charge of some two dozen rookies taking part in a citywide program to flood high-crime areas with extra cops.

But first, they decided to have a little fun. For 10 to 15 minutes, Carola and the rookies, all in uniform, hurled water balloons at each other and pelted NYPD vans with eggs.

No one was hurt and no property was damaged, but one annoyed citizen recorded the “fun” and turned over the videotape.

The timing of the horsePlay, on Nostrand Avenue near Farragut Road, could not have been worse. It came after a five-hour period that saw 10 people shot or stabbed in the precinct.

One veteran police supervisor said, “This was an incident of some cops letting off some steam while they were dealing with the stress of keeping the public safe.

“It wasn’t dangerous and, while it may appear unprofessional, it was hardly the worst thing in the world.”

And That’s How The Annual Celebration Of “Stabilization Day” Came To Pass

The Rent Guidelines Board’s annual hearing to decide whether and/or how much to raise rent on rent-stabilized apartments functions as a benign ritual for tenants to take out their frustrations about rising housing costs:

Amid total pandemonium, the Rent Guidelines Board last night voted to hike rent-stabilized rents by 4.25 percent for one-year leases and 7.25 percent for two-year renewals — infuriating tenants who said they no longer want to participate in the annual process.

The 5-4 vote came after more than four hours of mayhem, with more than 300 angry tenants, armed with noisemakers, drowning out virtually every word uttered by RGB Chairman Marvin Markus.

. . .

While protesting tenants were unhappy with last night’s outcome, they were pleased with their disruption. “We did a fantastic job,” exulted Jumaane Williams, executive director of the Tenants & Neighbors coalition. “We shut it down longer than it’s ever been shut down before.”

Tenant leaders said they decided months ago to disrupt the annual rent-setting meeting because they considered the deliberations “a sham” that always produced a pre-ordained result.

. . .

The meeting at Cooper Union was chaotic even by RGB standards, where screams and chants from the audience are routine.

Markus, branded a sellout by tenant leaders, was interrupted so loudly and so often that he called an unprecedented 2 1/2-hour recess at 6:30 p.m.

But that had no impact.

Tenant activists ordered pizza and bottled water and were waiting in full force when Markus returned just before 9 p.m.

As a phalanx of cops stood guard, Markus tried four times to restart the meeting — only to give up as one uproar after another drowned out his words.

The fifth time, Markus simply read a resolution into the microphone. Virtually no one off the stage could hear him.

We’ll keep you posted about next June’s Stabilization Day, which will be marked by a boisterous pot-clanged march down Fifth Avenue, a peaceful protest in front of Bed, Bath & Beyond and an after-party at an establishment to be determined.