I Was A Hippie, I Was A Burnout, I Was A Dropout, I Was Out Of My Head

After shocking us, revealing the real estate broker business’s seemy underbelly, coming to terms with the horrible truth about the industry, subsequently creating a stir and eventually carving out some middle ground, this week Brian Carter does some investigative reporting to determine who is entering this lucrative field:

Here at the [The New York Real Estate Institute] you can start your career after just one week of training. The state requirement for becoming a licensed agent is 45 hours of classes, and the successful completion of two multiple-choice exams.

. . .

While at the Institute, I spoke to Raul Mero, who, after just one day of classes, was excited about his future career. I asked Raul what inspired him to get his license. “A friend, an absolute burn out, this kid does nothing well . . . is closing six deals this month. If this kid can do it, so can I. Ridiculous.” It made sense to me. Raul just turned 32, and with his friend, the “burn out,” blazing the trail ahead, he was ready to leave his job in alternative marketing, which he explained simply meant handing stuff out to people on the street. Raul made no bones about it, he was in it for the money.

See also: Carter’s Rental Dementia blog.

The Golf Simulator Is Either A Coal-Mine Canary Or A Way Of “Empowering New Yorkers To Become The Overachievers That We’re All Expected To Be”

The latter is clever but developers don’t offer amenities unless they have to . . . the housing bubble is upon us:

When luxury condominiums open early next year at 20 Pine St., a former bank in the Financial District, tenants will be able to cap off their days by soaking in a Turkish bath, practicing their swings with a golf simulator, or perfecting their yoga poses in a private exercise studio.

Instead of hailing a taxi, those moving into 255 Hudson St. in SoHo will be able to slide behind the wheel of one of the vintage automobiles at the building’s disposal. Residents at 15 Central Park West will be able to watch a DVD in that condominium’s screening room or select a book from its private library. Meanwhile in Brooklyn, overwhelmed parents living at the Court Street Lofts can call on a “nanny concierge” to arrange playdates for their toddlers.

With a bevy of condos hitting the market, many residential developments are luring apartment-hunters with amenities that are transforming apartment buildings into veritable self-contained villages.

Call it “assisted living” for the family set.

“The market has demanded it,” a senior managing director of Corcoran Sunshine Marketing Group, Anne Young, said. “People in New York work so hard. At the end of the day, we do not want to leave our homes, but we still want the gracious lifestyle we think we’re entitled to. We want to go home to our own gym, our own movie theater, our own golf simulator.”

In this newly condo-crowded city, developers are looking to stand out, an executive vice president of Prudential Douglas Elliman, Tamir Shemesh, said. “They’re saying, ‘You’re going to pay $2,000 per square foot, but we’re going to give you extras that you won’t be able to find at other places,'” he said. “They’re not looking at reducing the price, but they are looking to give you more for your buck.”

. . .

The Ariel — two luxury high-rises in the West 90s — will offer tenants access to an on-site La Palestra fitness center, a billiards room, and a “pet salon,” where residents can “bathe their dog, without putting them into your tea-for-two tub in their $3 million home,” Ms. Trazzera said.

“We’re empowering New Yorkers to become the overachievers that we’re all expected to be,” a managing director of Corcoran Sunshine, Daniel Cordeiro, said.

Mr. Cordeiro said building-based services — from dog spas to steam rooms to at-your-service concierges — are quickly becoming commonplace in new condominiums. “To me, it’s like the Internet or a Blackberry,” he said. “It’s not a luxury anymore.”

He added: “These amenities, in hindsight, you think, ‘How could we live without this?'” [Emph. added to underscore hopeful spin]

Schools, Community Space, A YMCA And — Oh Yeah — A Multiplex

Plans for Kingsbridge Armory in the Bronx may be closer to Fine:

Ten years after winning control of the gigantic, castle-like Kingsbridge Armory, the city may be close to figuring out what to do with it.

Developer Peter Fine has pitched a plan — including schools, a YMCA, big and small retailers and a multiplex — to the local community board, and the process is inching forward.

. . .

The city inherited the 408,000-square-foot state armory — covering four city blocks — in 1996. Since then, plans have come and gone — but none garnered the required combination of financial backing, local support and political will.

Fine, head of Atlantic Development Group, one of New York’s largest developers of affordable housing, may become the first to nail down all three.

“We worked closely with local residents, civic leaders, clergy, education advocates and elected officials to create a community-oriented plan that delivers schools, jobs, athletic facilities, entertainment, retail and community space,” said Fine.

Fine has cultivated good relationships with many of the elected officials on a city task force overseeing the approval process, making significant campaign contributions. Like the plans preferred by the community, Fine’s includes public schools for 2,000 students, a 57,200-square-foot YMCA, another 13,000-25,000 square feet of community space, a retail portion with a major department store, a cinema and a parking garage.

Location scout: Kingsbridge Armory.

There’s Only So Much Cell Phone Snake You Can Take

Even though there is much to occupy us with, New Yorkers spend an inordinate amount of time simply getting to work:

The Census Bureau says New York City now has the second-longest commute in the nation — 34.2 minutes — a slight increase over the past five years and only a little better than Baltimore.

The average commute for the rest of the country is 25.5 minutes — a 24-second drop since 2005.

“We all should hold a celebration,” Alan Pisarski, author of “Commuting in America,” said sarcastically. “We’re saving 0.4 minutes!”

But even those 24 seconds might look good to folks in Queens, Staten Island, the Bronx and Brooklyn who had longer commuting times than workers in any of the other 231 counties analyzed by the bureau.

The sorry statistics: Queens, 41.7 minutes, Staten Island, 41.3, the Bronx, 40.8 and Brooklyn, 39.7.

New York had the longest statewide commuting time — 30.4 minutes. Even the Los Angeles area, long notorious for its traffic horrors, came in 16th, at 28.4 minutes. New Jersey was third with 28.5 minutes.

(And when you get to the office you can keep playing Snake, though I have no idea why anyone would want to do that.)

Score One For Opportunism

Meanwhile, The New York Times Editorial Board endorses David Yassky in no uncertain terms:

Mr. Yassky is undoubtedly an opportunist, as are most politicians and certainly all those in this race. But far more important is his stellar record on the Council, leading groundbreaking work on gun control, affordable housing, the environment and jobs creation — all important to the 11th District.

Backstory: The Post Oppo Research Machine Chugs Along; See, The Thing Is Was, Senior Year Was Just Such A Blur For Me . . .; Excitement!; Well, That’s A Relief!; Pay To Campaign!; Recipe For Hitting The Front Page Of The Sunday Times: Just Add Sharpton; You Know You’ve Jumped The Shark When . . .; Unite To Stop White Individuals!; The Sad Thing Is That It Was Probably A Carefully Crafted Statement; How Do We Put This? Let’s Just Say Identity Politics Still Exists . . .; Barack Obama: Some Guy They Stuck In There; Nothing Against Your Policies, It’s Just The Color Of Your Skin.