If You See Something, Eat Something

Three times as many people took advantage of the Staten Island Yankees’ all-you-can-eat food special as did reported something suspicious on the subway, figures indicate:

Take me out to the all-you-can-eat game, 6,000 fans told the Staten Island Yankee box office during the 2007 season.

For those who didn’t pick the unlimited-grub season package — there’s always next year.

The ballpark managers are improving the package known as the Pinstripe Plan by offering the all-you-can-eat option at every home game, for $15 a ticket.

As for season ticket-holders who aren’t hungry, or who are watching their weight, they’ll have to fork over $13 per seat — a few bucks more than last year.

The chow-down deal is available to season ticket holders (38 games), half-season ticket holders (19 games) and Pinstripe Plan purchasers who choose any of three seven-game packages, which include fireworks, entertainment and a game against the Yanks’ archrivals, the Brooklyn Cyclones.

Like last year’s popular plan, the package offers unlimited hot dogs, burgers, chicken sandwiches, water and soda at the Richmond County Bank Ballpark at St. George.

Location Scout: Richmond County Bank Ballpark at St. George.

But No, You Just Had To Go Where Everybody Knows Your Name, Didn’t You?

It’s unwise to become a regular at a bar that you’ve held up once already:

News of the first holdup spread quickly: On Sept. 23, shortly after 2 p.m., two men entered Red Hook Bait and Tackle on Van Brunt Street, as laid-back a tavern as they come, with lots of mounted fish and taxidermy specimens. The bartender, a woman, was alone in the place, cleaning a restroom and just opening for the day. The men asked to use a restroom, and when they returned, one was wearing a mask and the other a bandanna over his face, and both held black handguns.

. . .

The bartender banged on neighbors’ doors until someone opened up and untaped her, said another bartender at Red Hook Bait and Tackle, who, fearful of a suspect still at large, gave his name only as Chris P., 30.

The following Sunday, Sept. 30, the men struck again, the police said, this time at Moonshine, a bar nearby on Columbia Street. About 3 p.m., one man entered, used the bathroom, left the bar and returned wearing a hat pulled low and with another man in a mask.

“They made my customer lay on the floor,” said the bartender, Marni Ludwig, 31. “They held a gun to my head and I gave them the money. They were angry that I didn’t have more money.” The men fled with less than $1,000, again in an S.U.V., the police said.

But this time, surveillance cameras photographed the first man as he approached the bathroom, showing a distinctive teardrop tattoo on his face, said Sgt. Joseph LaBella of the 76th Precinct detective squad. Officers circulated a sketch of the man in area bars.

The next Sunday passed without incident. Then, this past Sunday, Chris P., the bartender at Bait and Tackle, was killing the last minutes of his shift, which took him into the early hours of Monday, with seven or eight friends.

“It’s about 3 a.m.,” he said yesterday. “I see a man and a woman walk in the bar.”

“I notice he has the teardrop by his eye,” Chris said. “I think, ‘This is definitely the suspect.’ They ordered some shots of tequila. They wanted limes and salt.”

Chris said he went to the end of the bar and told a friend, “who happened to be one of the more sober people in the place, to call the cops. I told him in a hushed voice.”

The Hey-Buddy-Move-Your-Fat-Ass-Away-From-The-Crowded-Stairway Initiative

This will save you that precious wasted half block walking in the wrong direction (what do you think this is, Rome or London or some truly confusing city?):

Compass decals will be installed in the sidewalk at four locations in Midtown to guide pedestrians, the city Department of Transportation, the Grand Central Partnership, and the Metropolitan Transportation Authority announced yesterday.

“Not a single person, native New Yorker or visitor, can truthfully claim that they have not, at least once, been confused as to which direction to walk when emerging from a subway station,” the city’s transportation commissioner, Janette Sadik-Khan, said.

. . .

Temporary versions of the compasses, designed by sculptor Gregg Lefevre, will be tested for one week, until October 23, at four subway exits: two at Grand Central Terminal and one each at the subway stops at Lexington Avenue-51st Street and Fifth Avenue-53rd Street. If they receive a positive response from the public, the temporary decals can be replaced with a more permanent installation, and other neighborhoods can ask the DOT for help replicating the program.

In Case You Were Wondering Why Some Cops Seem So Jacked . . .

After authorities raided a Bay Ridge pharmacy that allegedly sold steroids, it turns out that some NYPD officers were customers:

As many as 30 cops were rounded up last night and ordered to an NYPD medical facility in Queens to take drug tests as part of a steroid investigation that has rocked the department, sources told The Post.

Six officers are under investigation for alleged steroid use after a raid on a Brooklyn pharmacy yielded information indicating they may have received improper prescriptions, police said in an official statement.

The statement said no officers have been arrested and no arrests are anticipated.

But the cops sent for drug tests will be placed on modified duty. They are assigned to precincts in Brooklyn and Staten Island, and one is a high-ranking member of the NYPD, The Post’s sources said.

The investigation stems from a Monday-night raid on Lowen’s Pharmacy in Bay Ridge, Brooklyn.

On Applying The Broken Windows Theory Of Policing To The Mister Softee Jingle Crackdown

Maybe there was a method to the madness after all:

A Mister Softee driver whose jingle was so irritating that it even caught the attention of Mayor Michael Bloomberg was arrested for allegedly dishing out a lot more than ice cream, police confirmed.

Authorities said an undercover narcotics sting led to the arrest of a Mister Softee driver on Oct. 6, for allegedly selling cocaine and marijuana out of his truck at Bowne Park. Police did not release the name of the alleged dealer, but said they were led to the ice-cream truck driver after several residents of the area complained he had been loudly and incessantly blasting his jingle to the ire of the neighborhood.

. . .

Following the arrest, children in Bowne Park were granted an unusual treat. Because the truck was impounded, police doled out free ice cream to avoid being left with a melted mess in the police lot.

Earlier: How About The Sweet Sound Of My Fist Hitting . . . Wait, Was That Out Loud?