Message To The Various Assholes Who Have Refused To Drive Me To Queens Over The Years And Then Could Care Less That I Shouted Their Medallion Number Into The Cold Night As They Drove Away Because They Know No One Will Ever Show Up At A TLC Hearing . . .

. . . including the dick who wouldn’t take us to the airport just the other day (if you’re truly “off duty,” turn on your fucking off-duty light and don’t pull up when we hail you*): I don’t believe you. I will never believe you. And when people like me believe a city regulatory agency over you, you’re in trouble. So quit complaining and take our credit cards already:

The average cabby works nine and a half hours a day. A cab’s busiest hours are 6 to 8 p.m. And even as the economy has fallen deeper into recession, the number of cab rides each day in New York has remained relatively steady.

Those are among the most vivid bits of information about the yellow cab industry to emerge from a trove of new data collected by the Taxi and Limousine Commission from cabs equipped with new computerized systems that record each trip and fare.

Among the more surprising findings is that credit cards may be saving the industry from feeling the worst effects of the recession.

“The credit card that we put in cabs has helped keep them afloat,” said Matthew Daus, the chairman of the Taxi and Limousine Commission.

By last November, every yellow cab in the city was equipped with a credit card reader — as a part of the new computerized system — and as a result, Mr. Daus said, many corporations that once ordered black cars for their employees have begun telling them instead to take a cab (which costs less) and charge it.

That has hurt the black car business, which was already reeling from the impact of the Wall Street crisis on its main customers, financial services firms. The black car business is down at least 30 percent, Mr. Daus said.

But the shift has helped yellow cabs and appears to have made up for lost business as tourism and air travel have slumped and the disposable income of ordinary New Yorkers has dwindled.

*And yes, I know the drill: Get in the cab before telling the driver where you want to go, but he caught me off guard as I was fumbling with the luggage (where did he think we were off to?)

The Biggest Payroll In Baseball Now Has A Michelin Star As Well

Feel free to make fun of the Yankees whenever you want now:

When the new Yankee Stadium opens April 3, the choice of food will be a bit more varied than before. There will be chains like Johnny Rockets and Brother Jimmy’s BBQ, and sandwiches from the premium butcher Lobel’s.

But those who settle into the 4,000 or so well-upholstered seats of the various club and suite areas, which can cost as much as $2,500, will have access to much more.

A number of restaurants and dining areas will be for their exclusive enjoyment. And the food will be prepared at open cooking stations run, from time to time, by Masaharu Morimoto of “Iron Chef” fame, April Bloomfield of the Spotted Pig, chefs from Le Cirque and cooks from Elaine’s (because Elaine Kaufman is a big Yankees fan).

Some of the chefs will be at the stadium for one evening and others may make multiple appearances. . . .

Those seated in the Delta 360 Club, which has 1,200 seats, will have access to a dining room where chefs from the Food Network will occasionally cook at two open kitchens.

The only thing better would be if the Bleacher Creatures started chanting “Mor-ee-Mo-to” until chef tipped his toque. Which I’m sure they will do. Remember, these are people that still do the Cabbage Patch along with Cotton Eye Joey.

Location Scout: New Yankee Stadium.

Securing The Homeland

Maybe all those cameras everywhere are good for something after all:

Surveillance cameras have captured the faces of criminal suspects in banks, in elevators and on street corners. But they have also surfaced in an unexpected law enforcement role: as evidence against police officers accused of misconduct or of lying on the witness stand.

If This Were Law & Order, It Might Pop Up During The Third Act Of The First Half Hour, Just Before Sam Waterston’s Office Got The Case

The question is whether the arrow shooter is still on the loose:

Cops were searching Tuesday night for the archer who shot an arrow that nearly hit a Queens father as he carried out the trash.

I Thought We Had Helicopters For That!

Here’s something “shovel ready” that isn’t a gigantic waste of money. Let it die already.