What If Gossip Girl Were More Like Law & Order?

Then they’d quickly integrate really cool story lines like this into the show:

An Upper East Side all-girls prep school is accusing two elderly women in rent-controlled apartments of stalling its plan to expand to the building next door.

The Nightingale-Bamford School on East 92nd Street said it has done everything by the book since it purchased the adjacent space in 2007 for $9 million, and should be allowed to take over the four-story building.

But two women who have lived at 28 E. 92nd St. for nearly 40 years aren’t so enamored of the eviction and expansion effort.

. . .

“They are harassing two elderly women and trying to drive them out of their homes,” said lawyer David Rozenholc. “I really believe they’re heartless. They knew these elderly people lived there when they bought the building. I think it’s terrible.”

Here’s One Way You Show Outrage For Excessive Wall Street Bonuses

In a record year for bonuses, it’s reasonable to make them take Town Cars like every other self-respecting fat cat:

The X25 bus, an express line transporting financial hotshots from Grand Central Terminal to Wall Street, will soon be eliminated by MTA bean counters, CEO Jay Walder said yesterday.

The line — and many others like it that will also soon hit the cutting block — is essentially an exclusive club for just 20 daily riders.

“It costs the MTA $80 per person to run this service,” Walder said. “I can assure you that we won’t be running the X25 much longer . . . This cannot continue to go on and on. There are services that no longer make sense.”

Highbrow/Despicable Versus Lowbrow/Despicable!

For years, it has been settled law that artists — merchants of everything from hackneyed images of Manhattan to names on grains of rice — have been constitutionally protected to sell their wares in city parks. That apparently is not the case for the High Line:

In 2001, both state and federal courts ruled that New York City could not require permits for artists in parks under the First Amendment under a case brought by Mr. [Robert A.] Lederman. In addition, Mr. Lederman was also a plaintiff in an earlier case which established artists’ rights to sell on the streets in 1997, under the argument that the artists deserved the same protections as booksellers and others selling printed materials, who had long been exempt from licensing.

On Saturday, Mr. Lederman said, representatives of Friends of the High Line, including security and supervisors, had approached him all day, threatening him. Finally they brought a parks enforcement officer. “I showed them a New York Times article and a New York Post article about the artist permit being overturned and that artists don’t need a permit,” said Mr. Lederman, who said it appeared that the enforcement officer believed him. However, Mr. Lederman said that the officer was pressured to issue summonses and arrest him.

When asked about the situation, Katie Lorah, a spokeswoman for Friends of the High Line, said, “We’re actually not commenting right now” and referred all questions to the Department of Parks and Recreation.

The DPR spokesperson claimed the High Line was somehow different. The artist in question fleshes out that argument for them:

“The parks department and the High Line people have their own agenda for commercializing this park, and they’re hoping to nip street artists in the bud by arresting me,” he said. “Frankly I think they made a tremendous mistake. I’m not looking to make a big commotion on the High Line. I would prefer not to have to do that. I certainly don’t need to go back there to make the point. They made the point already. They gave me five different summonses. I’m not going to have to prove anything to the judge about what they’re intentions were and continue to be. I plan to go back there to sell my art if not to protest, and I have a right to. I intend to exercise that right.”

Location Scout: High Line.

No Complaining; Kate Hudson Can Afford It

Die-hard Yankees fans turn down opportunity to purchase $380 ALDS tickets:

Some diehard Yankee fans were on line for 14 hours early Wednesday, waiting and hoping there’d be tickets available for game one of the playoffs when the doors opened.

. . .

Paul was on the line since 7 p.m. Wednesday night to be there for his beloved team, and he’s on a budget.

But when the doors finally opened, there was disappointment bordering on outrage when dozens of fans found out the cheapest tickets sold cost $380.

“I live right here in the neighborhood. I attended 34 games in the stadium this season, and I am not exactly rich,” said Paul. “I can’t go on line and pay an extra $25 surcharge.”

“Absolutely, something should be done for people in the neighborhood who were giving whole new life to the Yankees, but this is capitalism,” said Sam Soghar.

Fred Negron was the only one of the group who chose to buy the $380 ticket, but that’s because he just sold his house and had the cash.

For comparison’s sake, Phillies NLDS tickets are between $35 and $75.

Location Scout: New Yankee Stadium.

“Friend Comes Over To Pregame With My Bottles From Trader Joe’s, And We Thank God For Unemployment Insurance Because It Pays Us To Live In Our Expensive Luxury Apartments With No Income”

Usually New York Magazine’s Daily Intel “Sex Diaries” feature just makes you feel icky. This entry, however, about a laid-off banker who has no sex, may be the first one to evoke schadenfreude:

I used to be such a romantic, but NYC has left me bitter and jaded at the age of 24.

Hahahahahahahaha!