He Tackled Transfat, Traffic Congestion And Now Climate Change

Time was, mayors cared about snow removal and potholes, but jeez, you know what, I’m sold — deliver him a third term already:

The streets of New York may look more like the canals of Venice in the coming decades as temperatures — and water levels — rise to dangerous new heights, according to a report released today by a panel of scientists assembled by Mayor Bloomberg.

Similar to a scary sci-fi movie, the scientists said water levels around the city could rise by two feet or more in the coming decades and average temperatures likely go up at least 4 degrees, according to a report by the New York City Panel on Climate Change.

“Planning for climate change today is less expensive than rebuilding an entire network after a catastrophe,” said Bloomberg. “We can’t wait until after our infrastructure has been compromised to begin to plan for the effects of climate change.”

I’ll Take Grandstanding Up-And-Comers For $1000, Alex

It’s not his inability to budget or his perennial up-and-coming status (incidentally, what do you call it when you were once up and coming but never got there — “the downstalling of an up-and-comer”?) but rather the Jeopardy questions:

A Queens City Councilmember recently found himself as one of the clues on the popular game show “Jeopardy!” and a day later the clue resonated in a real-life example.

The Jeopardy clue, “New York City Councilman Eric Gioia says 10 U.N. Missions owe the city $8 million in these.”

“What is parking tickets,” buzzed in a contestant with the correct answer for $1,200.

For years, Gioia has been a fervent voice in the movement to collect outstanding parking tickets and property taxes owed to the city.

“For a kid from Queens who used to watch “Jeopardy!” on TV with my parents in Woodside this was quite a thrill,” Gioia said. “We’ve got to find creative ways for the city raise and save money in tough economic times, so it’s especially important that the city collect on diplomats who owe the city millions in parking tickets and taxes. I’m happy Alex Trebek realized it too.”

New York Now Officially Lamest City In The World

Yes, you know New York is over when the city has to tell you what to see or where to go, but hipping everyone to the supposed joys of Mars 2112 is just plain negligent:

Mayor Michael Bloomberg has a blog entry on the official Google blog announcing a partnership with the Internet’s most important company to unveil a new city tourism site: nycgo.com.

Launched yesterday, the site “is the official resource on the web for all there is to see, do and experience in the City,” the mayor wrote. It features listings of events, dining, and entertainment recommendations. The site will be managed by NYC & Company, New York City’s official marketing, tourism and partnership organization.

Google chipped in with their Google Maps and Google Earth applications. Users can find recommended destinations from famous New Yorkers with the “Just Ask the Locals” feature (From Cynthia Nixon: “My kids are crazy about Mars 2112”), then get directions and send the info to their phones with Google Maps for mobile. Other partners like Travelocity will offer discounts and deals. Media outlets, including Time Out New York, Paper and, well, we here at The New York Observer, have partnered with the city to offer some of their favorite destinations.

Not only does New York have about 60 gazillion guidebooks already devoted to it but there doesn’t seem to be a shortage of web content about it, either. So yeah, maybe it is duplicative for the city to reinvent Fodor’s but hey, then you might not have learned about Mars 2112 . . .

And you wonder why we’re in debt.

The Telltale Feather

New York Post freakout coming in 5, 4, 3, 2 . . . blammo:

It was those damned geese!

A feather from a bird and “organic material” has been found on the engine, wings and fuselage of the US Airways airliner that crash-landed in the Hudson River, federal authorities said yesterday.

Investigators also have found that fan blades in the Airbus A320’s right engine “revealed evidence of soft-body impact damage.”

. . .

“What appears to be organic material was found in the right engine and on the wings and fuselage,” said the NTSB in a press release. Samples of that material have been sent to the US Agriculture Department for DNA analysis.

“A single feather was found attached to a flap track on the wing,” said the release, adding that the feather “is being sent to bird-identification experts” at the Smithsonian Institution in Washington.

It was the evidence of the old bird’s feather! It increased my fury as the beating of a drum stimulates the soldier into courage!

From The (Borough) Halls Of Power, A Much-Needed Call For Calm

Oh, well if Helen Marshall says so, then we should be just fine. I wake up this morning, see a bright, brand new day, and suddenly my confidence is restored. One short 90-minute speech later, a strange feeling in me bubbles to the surface — an overriding conviction that we — every single one of us — must do all we can to ensure that this elected official gets her richly deserved third term in office:

By turns a campaigner, cheerleader and comforter, Queens Borough President Helen Marshall tried Tuesday to soothe fears of a crippling, close-to-home financial crisis in her annual State of the Borough address.

“In this ailing economy, we can create jobs, we can build housing and we can boost businesses,” Marshall told a crowd of 800 at Queens College’s Colden Auditorium. “Naysayers beware, we will move forward.”

. . .

[S]he sprinkled her wide-ranging, 90-minute speech with optimistic outlooks on schools and libraries she funded — and asked constituents to reelect her to a third term in November so she can “get the job done.”