When Parking On A Slippery Slope, Always Curb Your Wheels

Actually I’d be quite happy with one grace period and see no reason to hassle you for more of them, as most sensible adults understand that grace periods don’t really work that way, but I guess if you’re used to nannying people you probably would think that the slippery slope applies here:

Mayor Blommberg slammed a proposed five-minute parking ticket grace period as a recipe for chaos.

“If you change the time, people would wait another five minutes and then ask for a grace period and pretty soon you’d have absolutely no ability to collect parking meter payments,” Bloomberg said.

And Then We Burn It, Right? Please, Please!

“In an event that organizers hope will become a New Year’s tradition, New Yorkers and tourists were invited to bring bad memories from 2008 to Times Square on Sunday and feed them to an industrial-strength shredder”.

OK, here goes:

• Bugs on above-ground public transportation
• Our innovative economy
• The notion that members of law enforcement are somehow unable to keep foreign objects out of perps’ buttholes
• The strong traditions of representative democracy and a free press
• Probably cockfighting, too
• People in their 20s sexing one another
• The bully pulpit
• People who hurt animals
• Posing as a gynecologist
• The cult of trees
• Fucking bed bugs
• Yankees fans
• Pregnant women who smoke
• Shit that just drops right out of the sky
• Jeremy Piven

Location Scout: Times Square.

Peter Vallone, Sr. . . .

. . . this piece is for you*:

By the time the bus got to 125th Street at Lexington Avenue, frustration had hit fever pitch.

Passengers on the M60 bus who had already been forced to stand were pressed against the doors. Others, trapped by tall suitcases, could not get up from their seats. Two dozen people with yet more bags tried to board, but a wave of exiting riders, shouting loudly, pushed them right back off. The same scene was replayed at the next stop, Third Avenue.

“They pack us in like cattle,” said Clay Crawford, 40, who lives in Harlem and was commuting to his job as a security guard in Queens. “Who wants this?”

Flo Lyle, 60, an Upper West Side resident, nodded. “If there’s one line in the city calling out for more buses, it’s this one,” she said.

Or, given that the M60 is the only public-transit option directly from Manhattan to La Guardia Airport, at least increased service at travel-heavy times like Christmas, suggested other sardine-packed riders this week as the bus inched its way along 125th Street.

This time of year, the M60 quickly fills up with airline travelers — and their luggage, resulting in a testy mix of passengers and delays that makes the idea of getting home for the holidays a dicey proposition.

Vikaas Sharma, a Columbia University student who was trying to wiggle a blue suitcase out of the way, boarded the M60 at 2 p.m. on Tuesday to catch a 3:45 p.m. flight on his way to San Francisco, where he grew up. But the bus did not arrive at La Guardia until 4 p.m., so he missed the flight, which turned out to be the last one available until Christmas Day — leading to the first Christmas Eve of his 20 years that he spent without his family.

*Grrr.

Craziest Super In Bay Ridge Transitions To Craziest Neighbor In Bay Ridge

The good news is he’s no longer the super. The bad news is he’s still your neighbor:

Richard Martin was his usual ornery self Tuesday when he told the Daily News his new landlord is just canning him — not evicting him.

“I can stay in my home, but I’ve lost my super job,” Martin said. “That means I’m out $150 a month. $150 a month! So yeah, I’m upset.”

. . .

“Have you seen the garbage out front of the building?” he said with a laugh.

“The doorway is a mess. There are big black garbage bags just sitting on top of the cans. He hasn’t done a damn thing since he became super.

“The new super — he’s a little Mexican man — hasn’t even swept the building yet. Not once. The last time it was swept was Nov. 23, and I should know because it was me who swept it.

“I told the new super that I’m giving him two months before he loses his mind and goes crazy over the sloppy tenants,” he said.

One tenant, who refused to give his name because he’s afraid of Martin, said he’s glad about the changing of the guard.

. . .

“Why would I miss Richard Martin …. He was the crankiest super in Brooklyn. Now he has been downgraded to the crankiest neighbor in Brooklyn.”

Price Of Slice To Rise In 2009?

So given the history, I guess this means what I think it means:

Proposals being considered by the Metropolitan Transportation Authority could raise the base subway and bus fare as high as $3, the 30-day MetroCard to $105 and bridge and tunnel tolls to $7 next year.