I Know Why The Released Dove Clings

Seems like bad luck to release doves on your wedding day that end up stranded in the park, clinging to life:

More than two dozen helpless albino ringneck doves — presumably released into the wilds of Queens as part of a wedding celebration — were clinging to life yesterday in a stand of trees after surviving a weekend of storms, heat and predators.

“People are looking to celebrate something joyful, and here they have birds that have never flown released into the air. They have no knowledge of how to find food, and they will literally starve to death,” said Rita McMahon of the Wild Bird Fund.

The birds were found Saturday in a tree near the park and next to the New York Hall of Science, numbering as many as 45 at the start of the weekend.

Location Scout: Flushing Meadows-Corona Park.

Nature Must Not Win The Game . . . She Must Lose

First birds, now turtles:

Port Authority workers rushed to the shell-covered runway about 8:30 a.m. and scooped up 78 diamondback terrapins that had left the waters of Jamaica Bay scouting a spot to breed, said Port Authority spokesman John Kelly.

Pilots from various airlines shared the news with stuck passengers who had to wait up to 90 minutes for their flights to take off so the turtles could land in a safe place.

Location Scout: JFK.

“Therein Lies The Problem”

Seems like help is on the way.

Until you request an area code 718 Queens number to put in the newspaper so Little League execs and coaches can call to volunteer.

Then a Parks spokesperson tells you to have them call 311, so that your request to help the department can be screened by the Big Brother of the Mayor’s Office and then ground through the bureaucracy while the outfield grass grows another 6 inches.

This is a runaround and not helpful.

Therein lies the problem.

We Are All Triboro Now*

It’s not just Staten Island — everyone seems to dislike the “Triboro” label:

For decades, stamps on letters mailed in New York City have generally been canceled with squiggly lines of ink and the name of the sender’s home borough. But this tradition may itself soon be canceled, at least in Brooklyn and Queens and on Staten Island.

Under the Postal Service’s plan, most mail from the three boroughs would be sent to a central processing center in East New York, Brooklyn, where it would be branded with a new emblem:

“TRIBORO, NY

BKLYN-QNS-STATEN ISL.”

The plan was spawned because of a 29 percent decline in the volume of first-class mail over the past decade. Officials say the change would save $6.7 million annually.

This is where a bureaucratic transaction gets personal.

“There are certain things you don’t mess with,” said Audrey Hecht-Stewart, 54, a teacher from Brighton Beach, Brooklyn, who was standing in line last week at the Cadman Plaza Post Office in Downtown Brooklyn. “The postmark on your letter should represent where you live, like caller ID on your phone.

“You can’t throw Brooklyn in the same pot with Queens and Staten Island,” Ms. Hecht-Stewart added. “When you go and lump us in with those other two boroughs, you take away our individuality.”

A host of elected officials, from the relevant borough presidents to New York’s two United States senators, has decried the proposal, along with postal union officials who translate a consolidated postmark into lost jobs. And dismay is rippling across this proposed new land called “Triboro,” where many who know about the plan resent the prospect of being stripped of their envelope identifier.

*Think about it — it could look cool on a T-shirt!

No, It’s Not A Will Smith Film

Rather, it’s just the police department using up some of that extra cash lying around:

The city’s Police Department and the F.B.I. will collaborate tonight in a joint counterterrorism exercise in Queens, testing New York’s ability to intercept a so-called dirty bomb.

Around 300 city police officers and 400 employees from the F.B.I. will work together in the exercise. The main events are scheduled to take place between 9 p.m. tonight and 4 a.m. on Wednesday morning on the Clearview Expressway.

Police say traffic delays on the expressway are anticipated until 1 a.m. Wednesday.

. . .

During tonight’s exercise authorities intend to use a detection device to intercept a mock bomb in a vehicle on the expressway.

Once the mock bomb is located, the aim is to transfer it to Floyd Bennett Field in Brooklyn and practice the procedures required to make it safe.

. . .

In 2007 the federal government created the Securing the Cities initiative, and pioneered the program in New York.

The aim of Securing the Cities was to establish a cordon of radiation sensors 50 miles outside New York to detect an inbound dirty bomb, and since 2007 the police have already received more than $53 million in Homeland Security Department grants to implement the project.

However, this year’s federal budget proposed to eliminate Securing the Cities funding in 2010.

On Tuesday, Mr. Kelly suggested that the timing of the exercise, demonstrating the potential to intercept a dirty bomb, is no co-incidence.

“The thing we are concerned about is the zeroing out of the Securing the Cities budget,” he said. “It is very germane to the exercise tonight.”