No One Wants The Bad Old Days To Return, But . . .

. . . combining criminal justice and entertainment — a weird kind of John Walsh wet dream — just sounds a little too much like some sort of dystopian Orwellian piece:

Some of the nation’s most wanted criminals are going to see their names in lights on Broadway.

The FBI will unveil a massive Times Square billboard today that’s short on movie stars in tighty whiteys and long on bad guys.

The digital billboard near the TKTS booth at 47th St. and Broadway will feature a rotating display of New York fugitives and a number for an FBI tips hotline.

Location Scout: Times Square.

Where Did All Those Yesterdays Go When You Still Believed Love Could Really Be Like A Broadway Show? You Are The Star . . .

New York was built on immigrants, dreamers and carpetbaggers:

Speaking from a conference room at New York University, where he is a teacher, [Harold Ford, Jr.], 39, expressed enthusiasm about his new hometown, though he described a life quite different than most New Yorkers. On many days, he is driven to an NBC television studio in a chauffeured car. He and his wife, Emily, a 29-year-old fashion executive, live a few blocks from the Lexington Avenue subway line in the Flatiron district. But Mr. Ford said he takes the subway only occasionally in the winter, to avoid the cold when he cannot hail a cab.

Asked whether he had visited all five boroughs, he mentioned taking a helicopter ride across the city with fellow executives, at the invitation of Raymond W. Kelly, New York City’s police commissioner. “The only place I have not spent considerable time is Staten Island,” he said, adding that “I landed there in the helicopter, so I can say yes.”

Asked about his baseball loyalties, he responded: “I am a Yankees fan,” and added that he had yet to visit Citi Field, the home of the Mets.

He has breakfast most mornings at the Regency Hotel on Park Avenue, and he receives regular pedicures. (He described them as treatment for a foot condition.)

Looking Inward In Times Of Disaster, Toward One’s Navel

Is there a local Haiti angle? Of course there is — “In a Quake, Brooklyn Would Shake More Than Manhattan”:

The last big earthquake in the New York City area, centered in New York Harbor just south of Rockaway, took place in 1884 and registered 5.2 on the Richter Scale. Another earthquake of this size can be expected and could be quite damaging, says Dr. Won-Young Kim, senior research scientist at the Lamont-Doherty Earth Observatory of Columbia University.

And Brooklyn, resting on sediment, would shake more than Manhattan, built on solid rock. “There would be more shaking and more damage,” Dr. Kim told the Brooklyn Eagle on Wednesday.

What, That’s Not Funny?

Would-be Annadale suicide bomber threatens Staten Island Mall Apple store:

A 17-year-old from Annadale left a chilling message on a computer in the Staten Island Mall Apple store threatening employees and customers alike with “bloody death,” prosecutors allege.

The author — Jason Barry of Eagan Avenue — told authorities he meant the note as a joke, but authorities are viewing it as a terroristic threat, and have arrested him on a charge that carries a maximum of seven years in prison.

“I have threatened your store and all its employees with a bloody death . . . On January 17th, 2010 whoever the crew may be working, or the innocent citizens that walk in… will be eliminated with the force of a 98lb bomb loaded with C4, strapped to my chest,” Barry typed on a computer at the store, using a name that belonged to his friend’s father.

That’s What We Were Hoping For From A Third Term!

Bloomberg goes to bat for the fashion industry to the detriment of the homeless:

New York City officials destroyed tons of new, unworn clothing and footwear last year that had been seized in raids on counterfeit label operations, abandoning a practice of giving knockoff garments to groups that help the needy.

. . .

Another government agency that confiscates large volumes of pirated clothing, United States Customs and Border Protection, donated $78 million in such goods last year. The donations are made only with the consent of the trademark holder, and are limited to essentials like clothing and shoes; they do not include fake Rolex watches or Gucci handbags.

In Los Angeles, shoes that would otherwise have been destroyed were given to Samaritan’s Feet, said John Saleh, a spokesman for the customs agency. Other ports that have participated are Detroit, El Paso and San Francisco. In New York, customs officials recently began working with World Vision.

“Usually the holder of the intellectual property rights allows us to do it,” Mr. Saleh said. If the trademarks can be removed, the goods are given to organizations near the ports, Mr. Saleh said. If they can’t be, they are shipped abroad.

Until recently, New York had a similar policy. In 2006, Mr. Bloomberg announced that the city would send shipments of knockoffs to aid victims of Hurricane Katrina. In that case, said Jason Post, a spokesman for the mayor, the city had the assistance of World Vision in sorting through the materials, a daunting task — but one that World Vision and the clothing bank say they still do.

Many major fashion brands have their headquarters in New York City, and Mr. Bloomberg has made prosecution of trademark infringement a priority for his administration. The companies also take actions in civil court against the pirates, an expensive process, to protect the designers’ names.

“These are people who spend hundreds of thousands of dollars, some of them millions, to get counterfeit goods off the street,” said Robert Tucker, a lawyer with the firm of Tucker and Lafiti, whose fashion clients include Chrome Hearts, Steve Madden, Zac Posen and Ed Hardy. “Everyone wants to feed and clothe the homeless. But how are you going to spend all this money and then put it back on the street?”