Approaching Target, Meeting Target . . . Aw Nuts, Now We're Exceeding Target . . . And Back To Not Meeting Target

September 29, 2014


Literally: starting to toilet "train" and of course we're environmentally gentle.



I'm terrible — terrible! — about remembering to shut them off and they're always running out of batteries. Might as well just spread out the clothes on the floor or whatnot and wait for me to use them.



The exclamation points stretched it out to 140 characters. Did you know about this? It's true:

Just in time for election season, more than a million New York families are about to get a $350 check courtesy of Gov. Cuomo and state lawmakers.

The checks, which state officials began mailing this week, are the first installments of a three-year tax credit program that Cuomo and legislators tucked into last year's state budget.

"It's as shameless a political ploy as we have ever seen," said E.J. McMahon of the Empire Center for Public Policy.

The tax credits, which will drain about $357 million from the state treasury this year, will arrive in mailboxes just weeks before Cuomo and legislators face reelection.

As I've said before, the scary thing about Cuomo is that the only thing he really stakes his candidacy on is getting elected, which is the worst kind of fucking politician. At least this is just one state; keep this goofball as far away from 2016 as humanly possible or an entire country will be sorry.

September 30, 2014


It's the really non-descript places that feel this way. A menu either sent or left at the door. Three-and-a-half stars on Yelp; combination of puff reviews and people whose business it seems to be to rate random places on Yelp. All these years, we've never been there. I'm trying to pinpoint the feeling, but it's just sort of cold and sad. Like a washed-up rock band promising to rock you, or a slot machine, or the Houston Astros. I really wish they didn't bother saying anything, but there it is. And of course I added the menu to our take-out collection.

October 1, 2014


The new DOE criteria for rating schools; maybe I was just skimming the article, but honestly, do we give a fuck how "interesting" the curriculum is? Isn't the curriculum the curriculum, and what's interesting is how you teach the curriculum? Unless they're teaching season 4 of The Wire, you think any of this crap is interesting? This is when the De Blasio administration seems fucking ridiculous.



More of the new DOE criteria for rating schools; what I love, love, love about this rating scale is that three of the four labels are basically positive and the endpoints make no sense. Such a fucking joke it makes Bloomberg's letter grades seem remarkable. I don't know which is worse, Cuomo's self-serving "agenda" or whatever it is that comprises an agenda in New York City. Fortunately, no one gives a fuck.



With the exception of the days leading up to and out of the MLB All-Star break, apparently one of the slowest nights in all of sports, and one I'd never quite perceived before. This was the day after the end of the baseball season, a Tuesday with no football and still too early for the basketball and hockey regular seasons. There was that goofy wildcard game, but other than that, only cricket and water polo. And preseason hockey and college soccer. Do you remember when ESPN used to show weird sports like that? Seems like a gazillion years ago. Anyway, this edit is too early for the Royals-A's ending, but it's representative.



Sometimes I think to look through my spam and I found this. Don't quite get what they're selling though.

October 2, 2014


More SportsCenter double entendre. Of course never not funny.



It's on this video at about 0:24. I think she meant "Latino" or some other more appropriate descriptor. Also, an inside joke of sorts.

October 3, 2014


Actually, a great deal of energy has been expended trying to figure out what's the deal with this guy. People, it's not the lack of belt, it's that crazy goddamn torso. People like that don't want to pitch, they want to show off their deltoids and sex you silly. Stay far, far away from them, lest you get a creatine contact high.



On second thought, this ad is so rotten that it doesn't deserve our mental space — sort of like subservient chicken or beheading videos.

October 4, 2014


People in Chicago sure seem to take a lot of LSD.



It's actually Greek, apparently.



It seems straightforward to me: one game to see who gets to participate in the playoffs. But that's not "the playoffs." I can't imagine the Pirates or A's feel like they made it to "the playoffs," either. That said, when the Royals played in three straight extra-inning playoff, I sort of changed my mind. Just a little bit.


It was quite a comeback, but I don't want to undercut my contrarian cred, so I'll double down and say that statistically, some of these hail mary passes have to find their way into the end zone, right? So no big deal . . . though in retrospect (after reading that first comment), the best thing about successful hail marys is the disbelief of the losing team. Such a pure feeling of defeat . . .



A six-month-old asleep at 11:30 on the table next to the laptop — work with me here, internet . . .

October 5, 2014


This was interesting to me at the time . . .



Because this was what I was looking up — how exactly kids made it from Westwood to Pasadena.



Remembered this from long ago and pleased to discover that nearly all Pac-10, er, 12 teams say something similar.



Still unresolved.



What's that thing about knocking on wood? Can't explain the buttercream frosting except to say, hold on to it because it won't last forever.



From the archives — not sure why I thought of it, but I did. I'm intrigued and a little bit scared about what they'll do in response to ISIS.

Posted: October 6th, 2014 | Author: | Filed under: Too Much Information | Tags: , , , , , , ,